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mlk_man's fun house
- Thread starter mlk_man
- Start date
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mlk_man
Banned
imported post
Maybe I'll try this.................
Blonde Texan
> > Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap
> > table. A very attractive blonde woman from Texas arrived and bet
> > twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice.She
>said,
> > "I hope y'all don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm
> > completely nude." With that, she stripped from the neck down,
>rolled the
> > dice and yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the
>dice came
> > to a stop she jumped up and down and
> > squealed..."YES! YES! I WON, I WON!" She hugged each of the
>dealers and
> > then picked up her
> > winnings and her clothes and quickly departed.The dealers stared
>at each
> > other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?"
>The other answered, "I don't know - I thought you were watching."
:shock:
Maybe I'll try this.................
Blonde Texan
> > Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap
> > table. A very attractive blonde woman from Texas arrived and bet
> > twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice.She
>said,
> > "I hope y'all don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm
> > completely nude." With that, she stripped from the neck down,
>rolled the
> > dice and yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the
>dice came
> > to a stop she jumped up and down and
> > squealed..."YES! YES! I WON, I WON!" She hugged each of the
>dealers and
> > then picked up her
> > winnings and her clothes and quickly departed.The dealers stared
>at each
> > other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?"
>The other answered, "I don't know - I thought you were watching."
:shock:
G
Guest
Guest
imported post
Hiyou doing thereMlk_Man,
See you'll still at it, Preferred Member...hum :^ (I heard that)
Hiyou doing thereMlk_Man,
See you'll still at it, Preferred Member...hum :^ (I heard that)
mlk_man
Banned
imported post
Okay, we need a joke. This may be borderline offensive to some so I apologize in advance:
[Edit]
Sorry Mlk! Tom didn't tell me where the boaderline was at! However, the punchline was a bit old after all the [bleep] discription.
Judgement call! But, hey try again. I like jokes!
Okay, we need a joke. This may be borderline offensive to some so I apologize in advance:
[Edit]
Sorry Mlk! Tom didn't tell me where the boaderline was at! However, the punchline was a bit old after all the [bleep] discription.
Judgement call! But, hey try again. I like jokes!
mlk_man
Banned
imported post
Let's try this one:
A woman comes home and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches I've been
having all these years? Well, they're gone."
"No more headaches?" the husband asks, "What happened?"
His wife replies, "Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in
front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat, 'I do not have a headache, I do
not have a headache, I do not have a headache.' It worked! The headaches are all
gone."
The husband replies, "Well, that's wonderful."
His wife then says, "You know, you haven't exactly been a ball of fire in the
bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the hypnotist and see if he
can do anything for that?"
The husband agrees to try it. Following his appointment, the husband comes home,
rips off his clothes, picks up his wife, and carries her into the bedroom. He
puts her on the bed and says, "Don't move, I'll be right back."
He goes into the bathroom and comes back a few minutes later, jumps into bed,
and makes passionate love to his wife like never before.
His wife says, "Wow! That was wonderful!"
The husband says, "Don't move! I'll be right back." He returns to the bathroom
and then goes back to the bedroom, and round two is even better than the first
time. The wife sits up and her head is spinning.
Her husband again says, "Don't move, I'll be right back." With that, he goes
back into the bathroom.
This time, his wife quietly follows him and there, in the bathroom, she sees him
standing in front of the mirror, saying, "She's not my wife. She's not my wife.
She's not my wife."
His funeral services will be held on Monday.
Let's try this one:
A woman comes home and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches I've been
having all these years? Well, they're gone."
"No more headaches?" the husband asks, "What happened?"
His wife replies, "Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in
front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat, 'I do not have a headache, I do
not have a headache, I do not have a headache.' It worked! The headaches are all
gone."
The husband replies, "Well, that's wonderful."
His wife then says, "You know, you haven't exactly been a ball of fire in the
bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the hypnotist and see if he
can do anything for that?"
The husband agrees to try it. Following his appointment, the husband comes home,
rips off his clothes, picks up his wife, and carries her into the bedroom. He
puts her on the bed and says, "Don't move, I'll be right back."
He goes into the bathroom and comes back a few minutes later, jumps into bed,
and makes passionate love to his wife like never before.
His wife says, "Wow! That was wonderful!"
The husband says, "Don't move! I'll be right back." He returns to the bathroom
and then goes back to the bedroom, and round two is even better than the first
time. The wife sits up and her head is spinning.
Her husband again says, "Don't move, I'll be right back." With that, he goes
back into the bathroom.
This time, his wife quietly follows him and there, in the bathroom, she sees him
standing in front of the mirror, saying, "She's not my wife. She's not my wife.
She's not my wife."
His funeral services will be held on Monday.
smine
Member
imported post
http://www.msn.americangreetings.com/view.pd?i=382219626&m=1652&rr=y&so
Very funny without offending anyone! It's been making the rounds here; very funny. BTW, that L fund has left me with a nice gain Monday and a gradual loss all week to put me back to 0 gain for this week. Maybe need to reevaluate.
http://www.msn.americangreetings.com/view.pd?i=382219626&m=1652&rr=y&so
Very funny without offending anyone! It's been making the rounds here; very funny. BTW, that L fund has left me with a nice gain Monday and a gradual loss all week to put me back to 0 gain for this week. Maybe need to reevaluate.
smine
Member
imported post
That's gross (although I had to have someone here finally point it out to me!! She got it right off, coming from hunting relatives). Whatcha talking about rednecks for anyhow? This here's the south and we gottcher redneck pictures of nearly everything.....will send Alabama Wedding to you! It's a riot!!
That's gross (although I had to have someone here finally point it out to me!! She got it right off, coming from hunting relatives). Whatcha talking about rednecks for anyhow? This here's the south and we gottcher redneck pictures of nearly everything.....will send Alabama Wedding to you! It's a riot!!
bkrownd
Member
imported post
Don't remind me...one of my father's sisters married a hunter, so every Thxgiving we all get to experience the joy of watching bags of dead birds on their way to the gutting slab the day before the turkey goes on the table. :U More cranberry relish please, but hold the turkey.
Don't remind me...one of my father's sisters married a hunter, so every Thxgiving we all get to experience the joy of watching bags of dead birds on their way to the gutting slab the day before the turkey goes on the table. :U More cranberry relish please, but hold the turkey.
The_Technician
Active member
imported post
I'm gonna string one up this weekend....
Hmmm, do I get the feeling someone can't stand going out in the woods this day and time.....to get some deer??? Sometimes I think people have been pampered too much.....and turned into wooses....
:dude:
I'm gonna string one up this weekend....
Hmmm, do I get the feeling someone can't stand going out in the woods this day and time.....to get some deer??? Sometimes I think people have been pampered too much.....and turned into wooses....
:dude:
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