Not sure how to say this, but here goes

[alevin]

CB, I need to kick in here as well. There was a huge misunderstanding/miscommunication that started all this, as she explained in her first note on this thread, there was never any deliberate intention to toy with anyone's emotions, simply human error and misunderstanding.

I shed as many tears as everyone else when I first was told she was gone, and was as shocked as anyone else to discover she wasn't. And as overjoyed as others here to learn it was all a monster misunderstanding that just snowballed almost to the point of no recovery. But recovery is here, today. And the truth is here today.

that took an awesome amount of courage on her part after the length of time that has gone by while she struggled over what to do, and people with big enough hearts will find a way to forgive her, even if they can't forgive me.

It wasn't her fault that she was reported as gone. My fault was in believing what I was told and passing it on, without waiting for better more solid confirmation in terms of an obituary or some darn thing like that.

As Malyla noted, its a lesson I learned the hard way regarding messageboard protocol, a horrible mistake that I will never make again. And probably no one else here ever will make that kind of mistake themselves after seeing what a horrible mess it made and how many people were hurt. If you or anyone else needs to condemn or judge, then let the weight fall on me, not her.

Like the rest of you, I saw her being logged on that night after report of her passing, and got word that it was "Lady's guy" and not her, I took that as the independent confirmation everyone else took it for and said so to Buster. Unfortunately I didn't know, any more than anyone else that it was her panicked reaction to something she never expected to see reported about her, combined with extreme illness that resulted in that widespread unhappy belief. I grieved as much as anyone else.

 

[FlippedOutFERS]

Allie, you're being too hard on yourself. You trusted someone you shouldn't have. End of story.

I understand people's anger at me. And I know the blame lies with me that I didn't correct things. If people can't understand what my physical and emotional state was like at the time then so be it.

As for the azzhat, well. That is apparently just one of the issues I have with the azzhat.

 

[Birchtree]

C'mon folks lighten up. Once you've been to war this is only anti-climactic stuff - small potatoes as far as I'm concerned. It was an unintentional event so cool down and move on. No one needs to be banned - let's not make the situation worse. I'm not even going to ask for the return of my donation for the urn. Two weeks from now life will be back to normal. So now I have to figure out who was the reincarnation of the humming bird that came by to say hello and good-by.

 

[KevinD]

I've seen this done deliberately on other message boards. I thought it was funny when the truth was revealed.

But this one is hilarious because it was all a big fowl up. Unbelievable! :laugh:

 

[KevinD]

Birch - It was just a freakin hummingbird. :laugh:

 

[nnuut]

 

[crws]

C'mon folks lighten up. Once you've been to war this is only anti-climactic stuff - small potatoes as far as I'm concerned. It was an unintentional event so cool down and move on. No one needs to be banned - let's not make the situation worse. I'm not even going to ask for the return of my donation for the urn. Two weeks from now life will be back to normal. So now I have to figure out who was the reincarnation of the humming bird that came by to say hello and good-by.

Perhaps it was just hello.....

 

[crws]

pain management is a nasty process where drugs and depression take over your life. Add infection and (prob) prednisone or solumedrol to the mix and as I can attest to having dealt with my wife's pain management issues for years, it is easy to be relegated to a drug-induced stupor where recollection of events, desire to go on, and emotional perspective is lost.
When you are close to someone having an autoimmune disorder, an infection of the spinal fluid or spine is as close to life-threatening as it gets, so it's doubtful that your feelings of grief are misplaced or invalid.
But it is the aspect of- what will it be next, or- when will it happen, is an everyday back-of-your mind thought you accept and deal with under those circumstances.
It is not only a (daily) test of character and willpower for those afflicted, but also of those who choose to befriend them.

 

[FlippedOutFERS]

Thank you, crws, for stating it so eloquently. And thank you to those of you who have asked how I am doing.

The update is that the fourth antibiotic (of a possible five) finally started working to fight the infection in my cerebrospinal fluid. I've been left with a touch of paralysis and my hair is falling out in gobs. But I'm doing quite well, considering.

And Spouse, whom I love to distraction, has already bought me fifteen (yes, you read that right) wigs. Long ones, short ones, curly ones, straight ones. Blonde, brunette, redhead. It's like playing dress-up! :cheesy:

 

[CountryBoy]

CB, I need to kick in here as well. There was a huge misunderstanding/miscommunication that started all this, as she explained in her first note on this thread, there was never any deliberate intention to toy with anyone's emotions, simply human error and misunderstanding.

I shed as many tears as everyone else when I first was told she was gone, and was as shocked as anyone else to discover she wasn't. And as overjoyed as others here to learn it was all a monster misunderstanding that just snowballed almost to the point of no recovery. But recovery is here, today. And the truth is here today.

that took an awesome amount of courage on her part after the length of time that has gone by while she struggled over what to do, and people with big enough hearts will find a way to forgive her, even if they can't forgive me.

It wasn't her fault that she was reported as gone. My fault was in believing what I was told and passing it on, without waiting for better more solid confirmation in terms of an obituary or some darn thing like that.

As Malyla noted, its a lesson I learned the hard way regarding messageboard protocol, a horrible mistake that I will never make again. And probably no one else here ever will make that kind of mistake themselves after seeing what a horrible mess it made and how many people were hurt. If you or anyone else needs to condemn or judge, then let the weight fall on me, not her.

Like the rest of you, I saw her being logged on that night after report of her passing, and got word that it was "Lady's guy" and not her, I took that as the independent confirmation everyone else took it for and said so to Buster. Unfortunately I didn't know, any more than anyone else that it was her panicked reaction to something she never expected to see reported about her, combined with extreme illness that resulted in that widespread unhappy belief. I grieved as much as anyone else.

I don't need to be preached to here about the way I feel or should feel. I'm tired of being told that. You feel your way, I'll feel mine. No one has any idea what any one else should feel.

Yeah, lets stick to the truth and not tell others how they should feel. It was also a monstor low brow act, and you can make any excuse you want, but for it to go on as long as it did, is unexcuseable.

And as for who knew what, whose word are we taking on this? You may have moved this ugly no class scam along unknowly, and that's for you to deal with in your own way, but you didn't start this. The weight falls on the person who originated this whole big lie/scam, I really can't come up with a word to describe what was pulled.

 

[alevin]

CB, I do apologise for the way I phrased myself, I was indeed trying to tell you (and Buster) how to feel, when I look at what I wrote above, and that was wrong of me.

Let me rephrase it better as a simple request that you (and he) find it in your hearts to try to understand and forgive her-or not. You are totally free not to do so and no blame on my part if you (or he) won't or can't.

 

[Birchtree]

Let me take a moment and tell you a story that happened many years ago when I was in civilian medical. I was called to the ER one day to help with a full code - I intubated this male patient and assessed his cerebral status by checking his pupils. The cardiologist took a look and said there was nothing there - no reaction. That's not what I saw. The doctor says put him on a ventilator at 40% oxygen and leave him - he won't live. Well I did put him on a ventilator but at 100% oxygen in violation of the order - he would at least get the best from me that I could offer. When I walked in the ICU the next morning the unit head nurse jumps all over me for not following orders - but guess what the patient was still alive. Shortly after the cardiologist arrived and I explained what and why I did what I did and used my experience to ignore his order. He assessed the patient again and told me not to worry that I was correct putting my job on the line. The head nurse cowered and from that point on she knew who I was and that I cared about my work. To make a long story short this same patient walked out of the hospital 3 months later with only a small cerebral deficit. He never knew who I was or what I did - but it mattered not. I have put my job on the line many times over the years saving lives. And I totally respect Ann and she should be allowed her say and not have to seek penitence for a mistake that was not her fault - no one really needs to be penitent. As far as I'm concerned her integrity remains intact along with that golden heart.

 

[KevinD]

As far as I'm concerned her integrity remains intact along with that golden heart.

+1.

 

[poolman]

Let me take a moment and tell you a story that happened many years ago when I was in civilian medical. I was called to the ER one day to help with a full code - I intubated this male patient and assessed his cerebral status by checking his pupils. The cardiologist took a look and said there was nothing there - no reaction. That's not what I saw. The doctor says put him on a ventilator at 40% oxygen and leave him - he won't live. Well I did put him on a ventilator but at 100% oxygen in violation of the order - he would at least get the best from me that I could offer. When I walked in the ICU the next morning the unit head nurse jumps all over me for not following orders - but guess what the patient was still alive. Shortly after the cardiologist arrived and I explained what and why I did what I did and used my experience to ignore his order. He assessed the patient again and told me not to worry that I was correct putting my job on the line. The head nurse cowered and from that point on she knew who I was and that I cared about my work. To make a long story short this same patient walked out of the hospital 3 months later with only a small cerebral deficit. He never knew who I was or what I did - but it mattered not. I have put my job on the line many times over the years saving lives. And I totally respect Ann and she should be allowed her say and not have to seek penitence for a mistake that was not her fault - no one really needs to be penitent. As far as I'm concerned her integrity remains intact along with that golden heart.

Thanks for telling us how you feel Birch. We all get it.

Now let other people think it through. Definitely not a 15 minute decision.

Very Irresponsible and Immature. :notrust:

 

[burrocrat]

welcome back lady! glad to hear you are still with us and doing better.

some random thoughts...

the paranoid part of me says no way, someone(s) somewhere(s) had a deliberate hand in the shenanigan or at least knew about it, that will require a suspension of disbelief on my part, but still glad to have you back. it's the internet after all, don't believe half of what you read or hear, you(s) weren't just trying to teach the nasty cons a lesson and make us get in touch with our feelers were you?

the kid is me says tough, the punishment was always worse if you hid the truth and didn't come clean right away. i remember the time i shot richard dawson right in the neck with my bb gun, match game '77, b&w tv all we had, and i'd been told not to bring the gun in the house, could even hear the bb's rattling around in there, knew it was loaded, don't know why i pulled the trigger, but it was a hell of a shot. tv went toast in a spectacular way, didn't even bother to clean it up, just grabbed my paper route money and got the hell out of there. mom worked down the hill and i told her i would be out for a bit, spent the next few days shooting pool down at the bowling alley and sleeping at friends houses. i gaurandamtee you the beating when i finally went home would not have been so bad if i'd just told the truth right away, important lesson there for me.

on the other hand, i have a hard time staying mad, about two weeks is my max. even if you run over my puppy on purpose. life goes on. some questions never get answered, just the way it is. won't waste too much time wondering who knew what when or did what on purpose or unintentionally. it is in the past. who knows what i would have done in that situation, and everyone has their own battles to fight that i am definately not partial to so not for me to judge, i was brought up to forgive so in my book it is done.

even got a poem out of me, how am i ever gonna live that one down?

light's on in the clubhouse if you're so inclined, we've been watering the ficus.

welcome back.

 

[James48843]

You know how hard it is to knock off a friggin' vampire?

View attachment 9864

Not easy.

They just keep coming back every time the moon comes out.

Lesson to keep in mind- -

tell the people that you love- that you love them.

It is important to tell them.

Because you never know when you won't be able to tell them anymore.

Lady/Ann/Morgana/FlippedoutFERS-

I love you, and welcome back. I missed you.

And I, for one, am glad you are here, and not elsewhere.

 

[JTH]

Lady, I'm still pissed at you but I still love you too. I'm grateful you're alive, I've felt empty without you're passion for the charts & your steady friendship. You're passing gave me many hours of sad thoughts. Thoughts that I'm going to be here when many of our friends pass on.

You get the "not cool what the fuk were you thinking?" award for the decade. I have no words for Fuk-tard, what he did is just sick & despicable on the lowest human scum level I can imagine. Dude you suck

 

[burrocrat]

You get the "not cool what the fuk were you thinking?" award for the decade.

oh that's big, and rich.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THdOWdzzNJI&feature=PlayList&p=344A30F411291C87&index=5

 

[burrocrat]

You get the "not cool what the fuk were you thinking?" award for the decade.

i second that emotion

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOeDEVyUBek

 

[FlippedOutFERS]

welcome back lady! glad to hear you are still with us and doing better.

....
light's on in the clubhouse if you're so inclined, we've been watering the ficus.

welcome back.

Thank you for the way you are taking this, burro! I'll take a "two week friendship suspension" over what I was afraid your reaction was going to be any day. I made a stupid mistake. I'm here to tell people that drugs can mess you up even when they are the RX kind.

Thanks for the invitation back to the clubhouse. But I'm locked out of my account there too. And that may be okay. I've found out that I'm passionate about some things over there, enough so that I forget to be a Lady. (You will remember one appallingly inappropriate example of that, I'm sure.) And because my opinion doesn't jive with the majority over there it feels like I'd probably better stay over here. Some folks are watering the ficus with live rounds over there.