Your Pension
Your Pension, Our Pension...
Unfunded is not funded...
Actually, this is not totally fair. The problem is that Federal Gubmint pensions are not allocated amongst many asset classes. They are invested in Social Security bonds. Maybe Treasuries. Anyone around here like all their eggs in a single Federal bond basket managed by 435 politicians? Bueller, Bueller??? Thus, CSRS is invested - but it is invested in one entity and one asset class. Oh well...
Ditto with the FERS pension... Yuk and double yuk.
And, even more yukky, there are Republican Goobers who want me to pay more into the Alpo Meal Deal Pension Plan. Now, to be honest, I like the safety of my Alpo Plan. It means that I don't have to invest in the 'G Fund'. I already got lots in the 'G Fund' with my FERS Pension and Social Security, eh... But, why would I force some 25 year old chump to invest in the 'G Fund'? Why do I want to force myself to buy 'G Fund' assets? Even though I am not 25 years old I do not want more of my assets going into the 'G Fund' unless I elect to buy into the 'G Fund'. So, Republican Goobers, give me this option (since you are so economic freedom loving):
- Pour 25% of the current assets (or some percentage) of my FERS Pension into my TSP account.
- Increase my match to 7%
- Get out of the way
- Bye, bye

I think this fair. You take 100% of all FERS Pension liability away from me for the cost of 25% of the paper assets you claim to hold. I think any corporation going broke because of an unfunded pension would take that offer in a second. Actually fast enough for the fastest computerized trading system to move an electron. And, folks, that is pretty fast. Gimme the Flash Pension Crash for Boghie Deal. The extra 2% in match is a significant reduction in ongoing expenditure (about a 87% reduction in current benefits paid). But, my plan gives me the right to invest those assets in something other than Gubmint stuff. And, it gets me away from the ignorant louts we routinely elect who spend our assets. I think that a win win, eh...