The_Technician
Active member
Welcome one and all....take your shoes off and get a fresh drink.....take a load off and no worries mates.....its party time while ya here!!!!:nuts:
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The Monkey Bar
- Thread starter The_Technician
- Start date
The_Technician
Active member
Does anybody thats in the "G" have any good jokes, lets here them.....by the way if you're not in the "G" you can't post here.....:nuts:
You might say that those here in the Monkey Bar are up to some monkey business......
You might say that those here in the Monkey Bar are up to some monkey business......
Last edited:
The_Technician
Active member
No way Hos'e, any position is good here, just keep it light and have a great time....
Hey Birchy, what do think I should get for a bouncer.....maybe I should go in the jungle of the Congo.....get a big 'ole Silverback....big monkey...
Anybody got any pictures of a good looking strapping Silverback that would take the job.....this internet Cafe needs a good one.....
Re: The Monkey Bar/ Joke
Jokes?
Here we go. President Bush is exiting his helicopter at his ranch and he has a small pig squirming under each arm. At the bottom of the steps, he asks the Marine standing at attention to hold the pigs for him. "I got one of these for Hillary and one for Nancy Pelosi" said Bush to the Marine. The Marine responded to Bush...... " You made a good trade, Sir!"
gnfishn
Jokes?
Here we go. President Bush is exiting his helicopter at his ranch and he has a small pig squirming under each arm. At the bottom of the steps, he asks the Marine standing at attention to hold the pigs for him. "I got one of these for Hillary and one for Nancy Pelosi" said Bush to the Marine. The Marine responded to Bush...... " You made a good trade, Sir!"
gnfishn
The_Technician
Active member
How 'bout this one?
Nooooo.....I said goodlooking!!!!! If its a girl she's gotta be pleasant to listen too also!!!!
The_Technician
Active member
Is this signs of a true Nnutt case????:embarrest: When I need a new song and dance monkey, I'll be looking your way Norman!!:nuts:
The_Technician
Active member
Eh FT, u do that pretty good.....can you talk to a Silverback and get them to become a bouncer???
nnuut
Moderator | TSP Legend
That's it, you got it, but my monkey is from the south!!! OOOALL. AAAAH, AAAAH, AAAAH!
The_Technician
Active member
Re: The Monkey Bar/ Joke
This gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "Here piggy piggy." :blink: :nuts:
This gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "Here piggy piggy." :blink: :nuts:
I tried, but Silverback Billary was screaming & flinging some really huge poo.
It's yur turn Tech. :laugh:
It's yur turn Tech. :laugh:
Eh FT, u do that pretty good.....can you talk to a Silverback and get them to become a bouncer???
GGal
Active member
Re: The Monkey Bar/ Joke
ROLLING ALL OVER THE FLOOR SCREAMING AND PULLING MY HAIR AND KICKING MY FEET AND SLINGING MY HEAD FROM SIDE TO SIDE AND TRYING TO CATCH MY BREATH!
GA
ROLLING ALL OVER THE FLOOR SCREAMING AND PULLING MY HAIR AND KICKING MY FEET AND SLINGING MY HEAD FROM SIDE TO SIDE AND TRYING TO CATCH MY BREATH!
GA
GGal
Active member
Someone reported this about SPAF:
Mr. and Mrs. SPAF are retired, and Mrs.SPAF insists her husband go with her to Wal-Mart. He gets so bored with all the shopping trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. SPAF loves to browse. One day Mrs. SPAF gets this letter from Wal-Mart:
Dear Mrs. SPAF,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. SPAF are listed below.
Things Mr. SPAF has done while his spouse was shopping in Wal-Mart:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies rest rooms.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the Sporting Goods department, asked the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible theme.
12. December 6: In the Automotives department practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
And last, but not least
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
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Mr. and Mrs. SPAF are retired, and Mrs.SPAF insists her husband go with her to Wal-Mart. He gets so bored with all the shopping trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. SPAF loves to browse. One day Mrs. SPAF gets this letter from Wal-Mart:
Dear Mrs. SPAF,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. SPAF are listed below.
Things Mr. SPAF has done while his spouse was shopping in Wal-Mart:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies rest rooms.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the Sporting Goods department, asked the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible theme.
12. December 6: In the Automotives department practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
And last, but not least
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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